F.A.I.L.I.N.G.

Currently I am failing at so many things.  At the top of the list:

• Blogging
• Sending out books someone bought from me at half.com.  Never heard of it?! I suggest you check it out.
• Church website. Go me. I am the person who volunteered to put this thing together. I'm pretty sure the church is going to fire me.
• Keeping up with my Etsy account.  Never heard of Etsy either? Check it out too!
• Reading (specifically God's Word)!
• Going to bed at a decent time (1:00 a.m. is not decent).
• Planning a zoo trip for Isaiah and the little girl I babysit.
• Getting my room organized. Bottom line: I find something else to do.

Basically, I need to get busy.  New blog post: check.  Now, I think I shall check off reading (although it is not the Bible... double fail).  On a more positive note: I biked 6 miles today (up hill too).  And, I got to bike with BROTHER Luke and my BFF Ashley.  We saw like 30 deer. One was a baby (spots still on) and it hid in the grass from us.  Well, it was alone, although other deer were around.  And we decided to check on it on our way back if it was still there.  Needless to say, it was still hiding. We thought something might be wrong with it, so we decided to walk up to it.  I was feet away from it, and it jumped up and jetted away.  It was probably the cutest thing I've seen in a while apart from Isaiah.  It was such a wonderful opportunity to enjoy God's creation. 

What if I'm Right?

what if there is a God?

and He created the entire universe, including you...

what if He established a people group? a group that would continue to disobey Him. a group that would find His matchless grace.  a group He calls His people.  a group that He came to ransom.

what if every sacrifice made by the Jews of the Old Testament pointed to the ultimate sacrifice? a sacrifice for you and me.  a sacrifice that would cost someone His life.

what if there is a love?

a love that knows no bounds. a love that is unconditional. true. pure. without blemish. without fault. 

what if all this talk of sacrifice, love and grace is just what we need?  what if this is our ticket to eternal life with our Father?  what if the Creator of the Universe wants you?  And what if He wants you now?

Isn't it much more wonderful to be wanted than to be needed?  Isn't it awesome to know we are not a burden to the one true God? Isn't it awesome to know we do not have to earn His favor?  He freely gives it. We just have to believe. 

And what if I'm right?

I never thought...

that I would get a call this morning from my husband who is half way around the world.

that a year would separate Matt and I...

not just a year, but thousands of miles of oceans and foreign lands...

that my life would be this crazy yet so wonderful! By that I mean: I would be gone for almost three weeks to help Matt prepare, and to prepare myself for his depature.  That my life would be non-stop... taking care of Isaiah, having my mom stay with me for a few weeks to get things done after Matt's departure, meeting new people at church, babysitting the most wonderful little girl in the world, patiently waiting for the birth of my new nephew Mason... the list goes on.

that I would be taking on both husband and wife duties.

that I would be living with my baby (not really, he's almost 20) brother.

that I would be waiting for 4 months... 4 months... 4 months... because that's when I get to see my hubby again.

I never once thought that I would even divide my life into intervals of 4 months!  But here I sit, trying to patiently wait for 4 months to get here so I can see my hubby. And this is just day one...

Life.  I never thought that this would be my life... But, God, however, is steadfast and unchanging. While my life is crazy, my Jesus is a stronghold.  I am thankful that Matt has had the opportunity to visit Germany this morning. I am thankful that He has given me such a wonderful husband and family who are always there for me.  God knew I needed them.  He knew I couldn't do this without them.  And, He has great plans for me... for us.