Monday, October 31, 2011

Bittersweet...

So, Daddy left yesterday! And I was a miserable mess. Seriously. I don't know how I drove Little Man and myself home from the Louisville airport. But, we made it. And, at home, well... I didn't even want to go home. I wanted to be anywhere but home! Needless to say, I was feeling horrible! This was so much worse than when he left the first time. I didn't have anyone here. The first time he left, we didn't really know what to expect. And, Matt was working, so I didn't get to see him 24/7 like I did this past month.  And, I was with my mom. And, let's face it those of you who have good relationships with your parents, we need them!  After spending all this time with him, and getting back to a complete family again, it was really, really tough to take him to the airport and leave. But, we did it. And, I was so sad... not just for myself, but more so for him. I thought about him having to be by himself all over again. As hard as it is for me, I still have Isaiah. I have Little Man to look after and take care of.  Well, those of you who have been in this situation, understand. Those last hours we got to spend with him before he had to leave are the best hours, but yet the worst hours.  Then, once the "good-bye" moment is over, you face reality... he's gone. We're separated by thousands of miles... and plane rides... and time zones. And, it is one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. Seriously. 

So... I got home. Got a plane ticket (thanks Dad). Got on an airplane this morning at 7:00 a.m... and left. I went to Atlanta where my mom picked me up. Definitely last minute. Definitely spotaneous, but definitely needed! I didn't want to be home. And, since I had a choice not to be... I chose to visit my parents since they are driving back to Kentucky this weekend, I figured, why not go spend the week with them and just ride back with them. So, Isaiah and I got onto a 30-passenger airplane this morning... and flew to Georgia. I am so thankful for my parents and the ability to do this. And for cheap tickets. You can't drive to Georgia for the price of my plane ticket. So, here I sit. And, indeed my life is still bittersweet. I am so happy to be able to be here, but I miss my husband terribly. We got to take Isaiah Trick-or-Treating, and that moment was also bittersweet... sweet because it was so much fun and Isaiah was so cute, but bitter because Matt couldn't be here to go with us. 

Daddy... we love you. And we are praying for you as you finish your journey there. We are proud of you for choosing to do this. Proud of you for being the Daddy and husband that you are. We will see you soon. And we will pray for you everyday.  Can't wait to talk to you when you get settled! 

So, Isaiah got to go Trick-or-Treating. And, he was the cutest monster out there tonight! And, at the last three houses, he finally got the hang of it!  So, here is mommy's little monster:



Oh, and he can even walk like a monster too:


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