Isaiah.

Isaiah. My Little Man. My Little Monster. My Boy. My Buddy. My Baby. My Friend. My Love.

And... my extremely-high-spirited-two-year-old-who-is-also-my-blessing-in-disguise.

I was blessed beyond measure with a strong-willed child. I don't really want to use the term "strong-willed" because many (if not all) children are strong-willed at some point in their lives. Isaiah is high-spirited. He is a very active and very independent toddler (although still my baby). Let me give you and example.  Today, I decide to break out this quiet book I worked on seemingly forever for my little man.  What's a quiet book? I blogged about my quiet book in this post, however, I never got around to posting the finished product. Anyway, they are great.  And, they are supposed to be entertaining, and as the name says, a quiet activity.  So, I created this page where Isaiah is supposed to "hang the apples in the tree", and I show him how its done.  Well, what do you know, Isaiah is hiding the apples in his shirt pocket.  The farm animals all had to join Noah's animals in the ark. The telephone can no longer make "calls" due to missing buttons, and the mail ended up in the baseball mitt.  The list goes on. Needless to say, he loved it. But, he wanted to test everything out. He had to it "Isaiah's" way.

Isaiah also loves suckers. We've been working on "potty", and if he goes, he gets a sucker. So, I unwrap his sucker, and hand it to my little monster. What does he do?! Cries because he wanted to unwrap it. So, this mommy wraps it all back up, and hands it back to him so he can do it. And, from that point on, Mommy does not unwrap suckers!

Isaiah decided he wanted to carry my grocery bag to my car the other day. He wanted to "help you" as he says. Well, I decided to let him. The bag was too heavy, and we were in the middle of the parking lot, and he kept dropping it, and so I said, "Let Mommy carry it to the car and you can help me when we get home." What does my baby do? Oh, he's that kid you see sitting in the MIDDLE OF THE ROAD. I was literally dragging him to the car. He wouldn't get up. I mean, you would think since he had to come anyway, he would eventually stand up and walk. Not him! So, I picked him up and carried him (which he hated) to the car. Isaiah is extremely adventerous. He wants to touch and feel everything. He is very attentive, always asking me "Do you hear it?" when he hears birds, the train, a car, a fan, the washing machine, airplanes, you name it...  He is curious. He is restless. He is a blessing. So, over the past week, I have been questioning myself, "What in the world am I going to do with him?"  "How am I going to deal with this?!"  A year ago, I could have given you all the answers to raising strong-spirited children. I would see a child acting out and think "I would not put up with that... EVER!"  It makes sense until you have one of those children. There are obvious things not to do such as give in (although all parents do that sometimes) or becoming abusive.  With that said, I have been doing some research on this topic, and these are some things that I'm going to try or think about during these testing times:

Number 1: Bible Verse.

¹⁸ “So commit yourselves wholeheartedly to these words of mine. Tie them to your hands and wear them on your forehead as reminders. ¹⁹ Teach them to your children. Talk about them when you are at home and when you are on the road, when you are going to bed and when you are getting up. ²⁰ Write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates, ²¹ so that as long as the sky remains above the earth, you and your children may flourish in the land the LORD swore to give your ancestors.  Deuteronomy 11:18-21 NLT

I will teach Isaiah these things because, above all else, this is the most important!  If I live a life of spiritual discipline, then perhaps he will follow by example!

Number 2: No Comparison

I will not compare my child to others. I will not compare is accomplishments and failures. I will not compare his developmental milestones, how quickly he reads, how well or how long he can sit still, what he likes... etc.  He is his own person. And, I often find myself asking, "Why? Why does Isaiah have to act like this when I see other kids doing (insert whatever here)?"  No more. He is himself, and I will nurture, encourage, and love him through his strengths and weaknesses.

I love this quote (in my own words): "Isaiah is a child of integrity... not easily swayed from his own viewpoints."  When you look at being "strong-willed" from that point of view, kind of puts a new perspective on things!

Number 3: Stay Positive.

I will be positive, and offer positive rewards and praise more often than negative.  I will say "yes" as often as I can, and use "no" only when neccessary. Sounds crazy, but Isaiah wants to be told "yes". He wants to be able to do what he wants to do. So, why not let him if it is something he is clearly capable of? Why not walk with him and show him how to do it? I find myself saying "No, you can't get into that" because quite frankly, I just don't want to deal with it.  That leads to a very, and I mean very intense temper tantrum.  He is full of energy, and it is going to require me to match that energy level with everything that I do.

Number 4: Be There.

Love him. Be there for him. Listen to him. Observe him. Learn him. Even when he thinks he doesn't need it, I'm going to be there anyway. He needs to know that I am always here for him, no matter the power struggles, the battles, the temper tantrums. How is he supposed to learn to guide himself? He's not. He needs a mommy, and that's what I will strive to be.

Number 5: Choose My Battles.

Some things JUST DON'T MATTER. And, I will use my best judgement to discern the things that don't matter, and leave those things alone. Along these lines, I find that talking to Isaiah about what is going to happen (i.e. you are going to ride in a cart when we get to the grocery store), actually helps him transition better. Telling him ahead of time (such as in the car on the way) that we are going to get (insert grocery list here), and you have to ride in the cart... really does help.

These are just a few things I will try to focus on with my little guy!  And, I will rely on God's grace to get me through! I will laugh when I can, smile often, and play with him even more! Because, he's not always going to be TWO! Our battles are not always going to be about going to sleep, or getting in the cart, or putting away the iPad... one day they will probably be much more intense!